12 January 2009

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Odessa city

Fetida Maritime Ltd

 

e-mail: fetida@fetidamar.com

skype: blackysky
MSN: blackysky@gmail.com
yahoo: blackysky
icq: 56714319

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Tel. +38-048-777-82-87
Fax. +38-048-777-82-86

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Nautical Terms:

 

Ahoy
The first in a series of four letter words commonly exchanged by skippers as their boats approach one another

Bar
Long. Low lying navigational hazard, usually awash, found at river mouths and harbour entrances, where it is composed of sand or mud, and ashore, where it is made of mahogany or some other dark wood. Sailors can be found in large numbers around both.

Boom
A Laterally mounted spar to which a sail is fastened, used during jibing to shift crew members to a fixed, horizontal position.

Bulkhead
Discomfort suffered by sailors who drink too much

Cabin
A cramped, closet like compartment below decks where crew members may be stored – on their sides if large or on end if small – until needed.

Calm
Sea condition characterised by the simultaneous disappearance of the wind and the last cold beer

Channel
Narrow stretch of deep or dredged waterway bordered by buoys or markers that separates two or more grounded boats

Current
Tidal flow that carries a boat away from it desired destination or toward a hazard.

Fitting Out
Series of maintenance tasks performed on boats ashore during good weather weekends in spring and summer months to make them ready for winter storage.

Flipper
Rubber swimming aid worn on the feet. Usually available in two sizes, 3 and 17

Flotsam
Anything floating in the water from which there is no response when an offer of a cocktail is made.

Fluke
The portion of an anchor that digs securely into the bottom: also, any occasion when this happens on the first try.

Galley
Ancient: Aspect of seafaring associated with slavery.
Modern: Aspect of seafaring associated with slavery

Gear
Generic term for any pieces of boating equipment that can be forgotten in the back-seat or boot of a car, left behind on a pontoon, soaked in the bottom of a dinghy or lost over the side of the boat.

Gimbals
Movable mountings often found on shipboards lamps, compasses etc which provide dieting passengers an opportunity to observe the true motions of the ship in relation to them, and thus prevent any recently ingested food from remaining in their digestive systems long enough to be converted into unwanted calories.

Grounding
Embarrassing situation in which a sailor returns to shore without leaving his boat.

Hatch
An opening in a deck leading to the cabin below with a cover designed to let water in while keeping fresh air out.

Hull speed
The maximum theoretical velocity of a given boat through the water, which is 1.5 times the square root of its waterline length in feet, divided by the distance to port in miles, minus the time in hours to sunset cubed.

Jibe
Course change which causes the boom to sweep rapidly across the cockpit; also, frequent type of comment made by observers of this manoeuvre.

Lanyard
A light line attached to a small article so that it can be secured somewhere well out of reach.

Leeward
The direction in which objects, liquids and other matter may be thrown without risk of re encountering them in the immediate future.

Life jacket
Any personal floatation device that will keep an individual who has fallen off a vessel, above water long enough to be run over by it or another rescue craft.

Mizzen
The shorter aft mast on a yawl or ketch. Any mast that is no longer there.

Moon
Earth’s natural satellite. During periods when it displays a vivid blue colour, sailing conditions are generally favourable.

Motor sailer
A hybrid boat that combines the simplicity and reliability of sail power with the calm and serenity of a throbbing engine.

Ocean racing
Demanding form of sailing practised by sportsman whose idea of a good time is standing under an ice cold shower, fully clothed while re examining there last meal.

Passage
Basically a voyage from point A to point B, interrupted by unexpected landfalls or stopovers at point K, point Q, and point Z.

Pontoon
Harbour landing place that goes crack, crunch when hit

Pilotage
The art of getting lost in sight of land, as opposed to the distinct and far more complex science of navigation used to get lost in offshore waters.

Port
1. Left on a boat.
2. A place you wish you never left on a boat.

Propeller
Underwater winch designed to wind up at high speeds any lines left hanging over the stern.

Radar
Extremely realistic kind of electronic game often found on larger sailboats. Players try to avoid colliding with “blips” which represent other sailboats, large container ships and oil tankers.

Regatta
Organised sailing competition that pits yours against your opponents’ luck.

Sailing
The find art of getting wet and becoming ill while slowly going nowhere at great expense.

Satellite Navigation
Sophisticated electronic location method that enables sailors to instantly determine the exact latitude and longitude, within just a few feet, anywhere on the surface of the surface of the earth, of whatever it was they just ran aground on.

Single handed sailing
The only situation in which the skipper does not immediately blame the crew for every single thing that goes wrong

Spinnaker
Large beautiful balloon shaped sail used in powerful downwind sailing, collapses at the sides to make control difficult and when lowered stores neatly into the galley and main cabin and heads all at the same time.

Tides
The rise and fall of ocean waters. There are two tides of interest to mariners: the ebb tide sailors encounter as they attempt to enter port and the flood tide they experience as they try to leave.

Yardarm
Horizontal spar mounted in such a way that when viewed from the cockpit, the sun is always over it.


Common Sailing Terms


Amidships - condition of being surrounded by boats.

Anchor - a device designed to bring up mud samples from the bottom at inopportune or unexpected times.

Anchor Light - a small light used to discharge the battery before daylight.

Beam Sea - A situation in which waves strike a boat from the side, causing it to roll unpleasantly. This is one of the four directions from which wave action tends to produce extreme physical discomfort. The other three are 'bow sea' (waves striking from the front), 'following sea' (waves striking from the rear), and 'quarter sea' (waves striking from any other direction).

Berth - a little addition to the crew.

Boat ownership - Standing fully-clothed under a cold shower, tearing up 100-dollar bills

Boom - sometimes the result of a surprise jibe. Called boom for the sound that's made when it hits crew in the head on its way across the boat.

Calm - Sea condition characterized by the simultaneous disappearance of the wind and the last cold beverage.

Chart - a type of map which tells you exactly where you are aground.

Clew - an indication from the skipper as to what he might do next.

Course - The direction in which a skipper wishes to steer his boat and from which the wind is blowing. Also, the language that results by not being able to.

Crew - Heavy, stationary objects used on shipboard to hold down charts, anchor cushions in place and dampen sudden movements of the boom.

Dead Reckoning - a course leading directly to a reef.

Dinghy - the sound of the ship's bell.

Displacement - when you dock your boat and can't find it later.

Estimated Position - a place you have marked on the chart where you are sure you are not.

Flashlight - Tubular metal container used on shipboard for storing dead batteries prior to their disposal.

Gybe - A common way to get unruly guests off your boat.

Headway - what you are making if you can't get the toilet to work.

Jack Lines - "Hey baby, want to go sailing?"

Landlubber - anyone on board who wishes he were not.

Latitude - the number of degrees off course allowed a guest.

Mast - religious ritual used before setting sail.

Mizzen - an object you can't find.

Motor Sailer - A sailboat that alternates between sail/ rigging problems and engine problems, and with some booze in the cabin.

Ram - an intricate docking maneuver sometimes used by experienced skippers.

Sailing - The fine art of getting wet and becoming ill, while going nowhere slowly at great expense.

Shroud - equipment used in connection with a wake.

Starboard - special board used by skippers for navigation (usually with "Port" on the opposite side.)

Tack - A maneuver the skipper uses when telling the crew what they did wrong without getting them mad.

Yawl - A sailboat from Texas, with some good bourbon stored down yonder in the cabin

Zephyr - Warm, pleasant breeze. Named after the mythical Greek god of wishful thinking, false hopes, and unreliable forecasts.

 

To the ladies... these are our rules!

(Please note.. these are all numbered "1 " ON PURPOSE!)

 

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it
yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth
the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.

 

Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight...

But did you know men really don't mind that? It's
like camping!